And three bottles of Martini please

The next time you pop into the supermarket in the morning because you ran out of cornflakes, notice that there are people buying wine and Martini when you can only think of a cup of coffee. What better way to shout out “I’m an alcoholic” then stocking up early! I have heard old ladies saying “it’s for the sauce” (perhaps the standard excuse) when they buy a couple of bottles of cheap white to the nodding and understanding look of the cashier. Well, however you twist or turn it, you are still buying wine at 10am. Why, you can not help but wonder, do they not drop by in the late afternoon, when they will disappear into the mass of the general public buying wine to take along to dinner parties? Your purchase will pass easily without the condescending look which, however inadvertently, must be thrown their way.

You must be thinking, if embarrassment was important to them, they would have ordered it online or sent the kid next door to go and buy it. But presumably,  even if they even use online supermarkets, they are like a lot of smokers in that they think that they might not drink anymore tomorrow. So no buying in advance: it has to be on the day itself. And what about the kid? Perhaps the embarrassment of asking the neighbour is worse than the look in the shop. And then why in the morning, when you are sure to be identified as an alcoholic? I think because it is better to be caught sober buying bottles in the morning than drunk in the afternoon buying more. The scale of embarrassment: how to stick to the lowest rung. You need a moment of sobriety to stay on it though.



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